No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
