You can't motorboat a personality
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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