I just cut my nipple shaving
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Randomize