Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
