i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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