it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
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