1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
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