shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
The adults are the big ones right?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
