its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
I don't think brook has ever known best
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Randomize
