Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
