so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
