woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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