yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Randomize
