that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
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