He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
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