He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
