dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
