Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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