His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
PANTIES FOUND
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
