I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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