Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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