Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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