I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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