also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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