So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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