Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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