its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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