Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize