Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
