dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
this beer tastes like vomit already
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
