that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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