If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Randomize
