I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
