I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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