you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
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