4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
The Olympian is in my bed
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