what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize
