We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I have aggressive nipples.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
