she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Randomize
