She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize
