i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
