I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
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