He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
