I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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