READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Randomize
