I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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