He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Randomize
