you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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