you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize
