I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Randomize
