We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
